opuscule
[oh-PUHS-kyool]
noun
A small or minor work.
Little did I know that Lydia from OKcupid’s opuscule happened to be my favorite 80’s porno: Inside Lydia’s Ass.
decry
/dɪˈkraɪ/
verb
1 to cry down. 2 to censure as faulty, mean, or worthless…
divest
[dih-vest]
verb (used with object)
To rid of or free from.
After my whore of an ex filed for divorce, I knew it was just a matter of time before her lawyers divested me of my house, car, and children.
transmogrify
[trans-MOG-ruh-fy]
verb
To change into a different shape or to transform.
If you want a real magic show, just stick a marshmellow in a microwave and watch it transmogrify into the fucking Michelin man.
novation
[noh-VEY-shuhn]
noun
The introduction of something new; innovation.
I don’t stay that up to date with everything, but I haven’t seen novation in the sex industry since the fleshlight.
churlish
Rude; cross-grained; ungracious; surly; illiberal.
The date with Kristy had been going so well for Lawrence that he thought changing venues from bar to bedroom would be a simple maneuver…
variegated
[VAIR-ee-uh-gay-tid]
adjective
Having marks or patches of different colors.
My local pot shop here in Boulder, Colorado has every variegated strain of weed imaginable.