gastronome

[GAS-truh-nohm]

noun

A connoisseur of good food and drink.

Kevin Smith refers to himself as a “gastronome,” while the staff at Southwest Airlines refer to him as “fat fuck.

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refractory

[rih-FRAK-tuh-ree]

adjective

Stubbornly disobedient; unmanageable.

My shitty hair is absolutely refractory today.

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eldritch

[EL-drich]

adjective

Strange; unearthly; weird; eerie.

I’ve always been of the opinion that an uncircumcised cock is eldritch and downright uncouth.

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gourmand

[GOOR-mahnd]

noun

A lover of good food.

My friend Diego, the gourmand, spends his entire fucking paycheck on bacon.

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emolument

[ih-MOL-yuh-muhnt]

noun

Gain; compensation.

Step on the little people. That’s my philosophy. Fuck it, if it earns you emolument along the way, who cares?

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bumptious

[BUMP-shuhs]

adjective

Crudely, presumptuously, or loudly self-assertive.

What they mistook for my bumptious attitude was just the Ritalin talking.

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rara avis

[RAIR-uh-AY-vis]

noun

A rare or unique person or thing.

John Holmes was, after all, a rara avis; a white dude with a giant fucking cock.

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